A Jar of Pickles, For Christmas?!

My father thinks he's funny. He is easily amused by his own twisted sense of humor, and yes, at times, so are others around him, but mostly, he's just laughing on his own.

I wasn't raised by my father. He had the luxury of only seeing me a couple times of year. Because of this, he never had to discipline me, and that made him the coolest Dad ever! Well, right up until I was 17 and he did this: just 17, and you know what I mean

Dad had just moved to Florida and was now about a 2 hour drive from me. I was spending my first Christmas with him at his new home. Spending his first Christmas with me was Bear, my then, boyfriend. (and after this little family display, I'm lucky he stuck around)

Dad, with his twisted sense of humor, and step mom, who always goes right along gave me these 3 presents:

A giant jar of pickles. Why?! I have no idea. Must have been a great idea to them, but I just didn't get it. I don't even like pickles that much! "Seriously, you got me pickles?!" I laugh nervously and go along with it. Thinking "Oh my God, my boyfriend is here, how embarrassing!"

Then I move on to the next gift, figuring the gag gift is out of the way, so this next one has to be good.

A case of beef Stew. Beef Stew?! I play this one off as okay because I really like beef stew. "Cool, thanks."

For sure, the next one will be really nice. I grab the next gift and start to tear into it. I feel the wave of terror rise from my feet up to my now very red face as I realize what I'm about to open in front of my BOYFRIEND! How could they do this to me?! I know they didn't have to live with me, but doesn't everybody know that no teen girl wants her boyfriend to see her:

TAMPONS!

Yes, you heard me right; my Dad had just given me tampons! And not just a small box of tampons, oh, no, he gave me a super jumbo elephant in the room box of tampons! My Dad was laughing hysterically, and all I wanted to do was run and hide. My life was over! I just knew Bear would leave me and tell the whole world about my crazy family! it's the end of the world as we know it (REM)

 That's when Dad announces that my real gift is inside the tampon box. I had to pull all the dang things out to find that he had wrapped money around the tampons!

Money! Woohoo! I love money!  Thanks Dad, but next time...seriously...please just put it in an envelope!


Today's prompt at Mama Kat's was: A Christmas Gift that was not well received.
Mama's Losin' It