Pour Your Heart Out, Sometimes A Girl Needs to Vent

I started blogging to tell my story, share my viewpoint, and make connections. Somewhere along the line, I lost of sight of that, and what was once a great outlet for me became work. I'm trying to get back in touch with me and why I started this.

I've struggled to balance blogging, work, and school, not to mention everything else that comes along with life. The latest life challenge has been my health.

I know that so many people have problems bigger than mine, so I try not to complain about it. But, sometimes a girl needs to vent!

Here's the thing:

I'm tired of: being in pain, lacking focus, feeling week, getting dizzy, relying on energy drinks, wondering if I'm keeping him satisifed enough, and feeling 88 when I'm only 38.

I hate: really being too tired, not feeling like going out, having to ask for help, not staying awake through a movie, and feeling 88 when I'm only 38.

I no longer: wear heels, feel sexy, write as much as I'd like, read as much as I'd like, feel confident, know that I'm enough for him, feel independent, but I still feel 88 when I'm really 38.

I worry: that I won't ever feel better, that I'm a burden, that love is not all we need, that I forgot something reallly important, that things are worse than they seem, that I won't make it to 88 because I feel this way at 38.

but,

I know: that he loves me, every day is a new day and a new opportunity, that I am so much better off than many others, that I have a lot of support, that I'm going to finally start my own business, that I can find time to blog if I try hard enough, that I'm eating healthier, and that today I may feel 88, but I'm only 38 so I have plenty of time.

♪It's a beautiful day♪ (U2)