Post-it Note Tuesday- Disney at Christmas











Let me say it again Merry Christmas

Happy Christmas Eve to you all, well, that is if you celebrate it, I do, but only for the commercialism. :)

So, are you tired of Christmas songs, yet? How many versions of the same song, can you think of? (and really, what was wrong with the first couple of recordings, that made someone feel they needed to remake it?) My favorite Christmas song: (I know you're waiting on pins and needles, because my favorite song is all that's on your mind today. I can see you standing there waiting in Antici... (borrowing from my fave Rocky Horror Picture Show moment ) ...pation.) It is Winter Wonderland and it has been recorded too many times to count by such artists as: Bob Dylan, George Strait, Tony Bennett, Karen Carpenter, Perry Como, Bing Crosby, Rosemary Clooney, Eurythmics, Elvis Presley, Goldfrapp, Cyndi Lauper, Darlene Love, Johnny Mathis, Ozzy Osbourne, Dolly Parton, Frank Sinatra, Stryper, Jason Mraz, (thanks to Wikipedia for the info, love ya, wiki!) Can you imagine Ozzy singing it?! something like this ♪wakwainawindaWhadafock?! SHARON!!!! ♪

So my favorite version? My own, of course! You should hear it! Absolutely fabulous! Like Grammy award winning stuff! (is that a category? best new rendition of an old holiday song?) and if you want to pile up into my bathroom, you'll be sure to hear a late night shower performance of it later tonight.

Need a good laugh today? check out Supahmommy's posting about another overplayed Christmas song.
♪There won't be snow in Florida this Christmas time♪

Not really how it goes, but it's true, I'm not going to have any snow, well unless you count the foam at Disney's very merry Christmas? and I do not! So, be sure to cry a tear for my non-Walking in a Winter Wonderland self. Oh! and isn't the greatest gift, anywhere?! life?! I'm certainly not gonna say "Thanks for the Kindle, but, I really don't want this life anymore, take it back." I'm just saying! It's not that I don't feel for starving children in Africa, but who cares if they know it's Christmas time?! They probably wouldn't like the commercialism, anyway!

This Christmas be sure to:

Bake plenty of cookies, but be careful where you leave them, (if you don't know why, read this.)

Watch any one of the many versions of A Christmas Carol (heck watch all 13, if you want, I don't care.)

Be careful with BB guns, (you'll shoot your eye out.)

Don't overcook the turkey, and mix cat food with the jello (unless you're trying to reenact Christmas Vacation, in which case, be sure to kidnap your boss, and demand a large bonus)

By all means, please wear a padded bra with that Christmas Sweater, (a thermometer works fine, no need for visuals of how cold it is while I'm trying to eat my Christmas pudding)

And, if you want to stick your tongue to a flagpole? Go right ahead! What do I care?!

I hope you all have a fabulous Christmas! I've told Santa to just skip me and give you all my gifts (so you should be nice and cozy by my coal lit fire.)

♪Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day you gave it away. This year, to save me from tears, I'll give it to someone special.♪

(originally by Wham, but in true to Christmas form it has been... yes! that's right... rerecorded! by Taylor Swift and Ashley Tisdale but the version I'm singing is Wham!)

Wordless (full) Wednesday- Bourbon Street


Oh, what fun we had! We laughed, we danced, we ate, and yes, we shared a few (okay, so, maybe, more than a few) adult beverages. Afterall, it is Bourbon Street!
Songs heard most while roaming the French Quarter:
♪Who dat? Who dat? Who dat think they gonna beat them Saints?♪
Best version was by a band playing at the Famous Door while we were watching the Saints/Cowboys game. The lead singer was a cute little girl with this deep raspy Janis Joplin type voice, and the big personality to match. During the final 2 minutes of the game, when it looked like they might come back, she just sang to the TV in an effort to will them towards a win. Although, we aren't Saints fans, (Love my Patriots!) We couldn't help but get into the spirit with the whole city cheering for them.
♪Oh, when the Saints go marching in
when the Saints go marching in♪
This can be heard in almost all the gift shops and from many of the bands. The best rendition was by a street performer at The Cafe du Monde. While I floated in my powder sugar, beignet high, he sang and played a mean trumpet.
We also heard some great Zydeco, and Jazz at various places, but still the best place to hear great local bands is the Crazy Corner. One band heard this time played an incredibly enthusiastic rub board and accordian which combined zydeco with some edgier rock sounds. Great combination!

Post-it Note Tuesday- Mmmm New Orleans

I have a lot of random thoughts in my head right now, so I thought I'd share a few, and when better to do so then post-it note Tuesday! Want to see more people's post-it note thoughts? Check out Supah Mommy



































Not This year, Santa!

Every year, our house gets a visit from the man in the Red suit. You know the one, the guy from up north?! No, not Canada! Further North! The crazy guy that laughs a lot and plays with elves, and drives a shiny new sled. Come to think of it; he must be on a lease plan, because it always looks brand new, although you'd think by now he would have upgraded to a motorized model, and given those poor deer a break! Does PETA know about this?!
So every year, he comes to our house, eats my cookies, (which he just assumes to be for him just because their laying out. Who does that?! Who goes to some one's house and just eats whatever they have laying around?!) takes the carrots, and leaves behind presents, that are always way better than the presents we got for the kids! Just once, I'd like to get the big, happy, screaming of "Thank you, thank you thank you, oh my gosh, it's what I always wanted!" for the gifts I bought and wrapped. Even, when I think I've done so good, he always outdoes me!
And what about this List he supposedly has?! The Naughty or Nice list the one he checks twice? Where is this Naughty list?! My kids have done some pretty naughty things over the years, but he still shows up! Without Fail, I'm awakened way, too, before the butt crack of dawn, early, to cries of "Santa came, he came, & look what he got me!"
I think "great! and I'm sure it's fabulous!" and pretend to be excited over every little thing. But the truth? I'm jealous!
I admit it! I'm jealous of that man! He's so damn jolly all the time! Well, why shouldn't he be?! He lives in a palace! Has elves to do all the work for him! He goes around eating everyone else's food! And even with his celebrity status, manages to avoid the paparazzi, and just live his perfect life of luxury! And every one thinks he's sooooo perfect!
Shouldn't he be arrested for breaking and entering? Didn't he run over some Gramma a few years back?! That has to be a crime! How does he afford all those toys?! Is he embezzling?! What's all that white stuff around his house?! Uh huh, a little snow up the nose for energy?! Uh huh. I bet he's a sham! Alert the National Enquirer! They love stories of celebrities done wrong. They'll figure it out.
I've had enough! This year, I won't be outdone! This year, I'm taking the kids to Disney World! Even jolly Old St. Nicklaus can't top a talking mouse with flying elephants, and toys that come to life! Nope, you're not outdoing me this year, big guy! This year's mine!
♪I've warned all my friends and neighbors. Better watch out for yourselves! They should never give a license to a man who drives a sleigh and plays with elves.♪

The Door- Wordless Wednesday

The Door
The cause of my pain,
it's at the door
Scratching in silence
can't hear it no more
My door is closed
it's locked up tight
it's no longer hard
to sleep at night
My anger's my pillow
shoved over my head
it comforts and soothes
the words you said
and still you stand
outside the door
knocking, knocking,
you've come back for more
More what?! More pain?!
No, thanks! I've had enough!
I scream out in rage to just go away
the knocking grows stronger, harder
impossible to ignore
I put down my pillow
I'm angry no more
The pain subsides
empty remains
complacent resides
just this side the door


♪Maybe I should find a common ground, scratch another problem off my list, go ahead and kick me when I'm down, but I'm not leaving it like this ♪
(Uncle Kracker)

Writer's Workshop Signs

It's Writer's Workshop day again at Mama's Losin' it. Today's prompt: If you were the type to believe in "signs," describe a "sign" you have received from someone.

♪Sign, sign, everywhere a sign♪
I am a definite believer in signs, karma, fate, etc. Things happen for a reason. Whether it is your ancestors that have passed, or the universe around you trying to tell you something, it is happening for a reason! so you must pay attention to signs!
Just look at The Final Destination movies. If those kids hadn't paid attention to the signs, they would have all died in one big fiery accident, instead of extending their life long enough to live their last moments stressing about death chasing them and ultimately dying alone, but in much more exciting death scenes. So, see signs are very important!
And what about that sign that said "wet floor"? You ignored that sign and look at you just lying there on your back! Not only are you hurt and embarrassed, but now...You're wet! Should have seen the sign!


This guy definitely, should have paid attention to the sign!



Now, I know, none of you ignore that big red sign that says "Sale!" But in this case, maybe you should because: I don't always have money when there is a great sale, so I come back later, when I do have money, and dang it! All the stuff is gone! You beeeeeotches bought it all! So, if you're going to pay attention to signs, can you ignore that one?! Please?!

♪Do this, don't do that, can't you read the sign?♪

(Five Man Electrical band)



Wordful Wednesday- Imagine

♪Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
and no religion, too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace♪
I was walking from the gym to work, when I stopped to take this picture with my phone. I wanted to capture the peacefulness of the morning. People everywhere were on their way to work, or school, or they were preparing for holiday shopping, or doing chores at home. Everyone, busy doing, something. And for that brief moment, I felt calm and serene, in the realization that world peace is all around us. It's not something to wish for, on a holiday list, or pray for in church on Sunday. World peace is all around us. It's there in the lakes and trees. It's in the birds and flowers, and in the sky and air around us. We just have to step out of our busy lives, and look around.
This year, instead of worrying about what to put on your list, or fretting about getting someone the perfect gift, stop and look at the world around you. don't stress over the little things. Share your moments of peace with those you love. Find a way to make a stranger smile, even if only for a moment. Share in laughter and music, and share love.
We can't solve the world's problems, but we can make our lives a little more peaceful.
♪Imagine, no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
sharing all the world♪

Writer's Workshop: Never Say Goodbye

Today is Writer's Workshop day at Mama Kat's .
The prompt: Verse by Verse, dissect a favorite song you had in 7th grade. Now, you know, I couldn't pass up a prompt that was song related!

When I think of the 7th grade, one song plays in my head. I cried to it, thinking of that cute boy. I thought of it as a theme song for my friends and I who had big dreams of getting out of a small town. And, most importantly, me and my best girlfriends danced to it in a group circle, in the cafeteria, at the last dance of the year. It was the finale of a great year that would, too soon, come to an end.

Never Say Goodbye
by Bon Jovi
♪As I sit in this smokey room
the night about to end
I pass my time with strangers
but the bottle's my only friend♪
Wow! What an amazing visual! But probably not appropriate for 7th grade, but that's ok, we were probably busy talking and giggling through this part of the song, then someone realized it was on, and we'd get excited "Oh my gosh! It's our song!" Then lots of screaming, and swooning.
♪Remember when we used to park
on Butler Street out in the dark
Remember when we lost the keys
and you lost more than that in my back seat♪
Okay, so, obviously, not driving in 7th grade, but, yes, I certainly knew what was happening in that car! So scary, and weird for me now, because of my own daughters. I couldn't even imagine them thinking about that in 7th grade. Thankfully, they're not like me in that aspect!
♪Remember how we used to talk
about busting out- We'd break their hearts
together forever♪
And that was my favorite part of the song! The part that said it all! We'll show them! We'll run away and be stars. My mother will regret being so mean. And all those kids that called me "Carrot Top" and "Woody Woodpecker" they'll wish they were nicer when I'm the next Molly Ringwald! (Because, she was the best actress ever! Okay, really it was just because she had red hair and was in some good movies, but "She was the best actress ever!")
♪Never say goodbye, never say goodbye
you and me and my old friends, hoping it would never end
Never say goodbye, never say goodbye
holdin' on we got to try, holdin' on to never say goodbye♪
It was at this point that we would all begin crying, and promising one another to never stop being friends. It didn't matter that we were being split up between 3 schools for 8th grade, we would still talk and spend all our weekends together. And we did, well, for a month or 2, then we slowly grew apart. We all made new friends, played sports, joined drama, had boyfriends, got married...
As I listen to this song now, it has so much pain. While it always reminds me of the 7th grade dance, and that group of friends. I now think of many other people, and plans, met and made. We all have dreams, and loves, and friendships that have slipped away over the years. Some have been replaced by better ones, and others are just irreplaceable, but they live on in the sights and songs of those moments. These memories paint the pictures of our lives.
7th grade was an end of an era, and as we danced in that big circle, holding on to each other, making promises, we really were holding onto never saying goodbye. We just didn't hold on tight enough.

The Scale and Random Thoughts

I rarely step on a scale for 2 reasons:

1. Because I think it is not always accurate to getting in shape. Muscle weighs more, you can tell when you're clothes fit better, etc... blah, blah, blah

2. I just don't like what it has to say! and it usually says the same thing! (which reminds me of Rihanna and her songs that always seem to have an echo) ♪Umbrella ella ella♪ ♪Shut up and drive ive ive♪

Today was different! The scale sang a different tune! One of happiness, & delight (not Deee-lite) ♪Groove is in the heart♪ although that is a nice, upbeat tune :)

It told me that I had finally, finally, broke through the barrier! I had made it up the wall (like "See-gar!" in Officer and a Gentleman) and I can now say: "I am under 200lbs!" (and that's with the extra thanksgiving cheesecake!)
♪Go me go me it's my birthday, it's my birthday♪ (can you see me dancing around the room?)


**We got some good news, today. One of the boys that took the Alcohol (need to catch up? read: What Do You Mean, They Robbed a Liquor Store? go ahead, I'll wait) so, one of the boys, turned himself in, and allegedly, told the officer that the girls were not involved. So, maybe, just maybe, my #1 won't be charged, and she'll get to serve a lesser term.
♪And the warden sang, come on somebody♪ (Ol' Red by Blake Shelton)

** It's December! I love the Yuletide season! Never have enough time, but, still I love it! We have taken some of the decorations down from the attic, and the rest will come down this weekend ♪Deck the halls, with bows of holly♪

**17 days until my weekend Getaway to New Orleans! Excited because I love the City, the food and the people, and this time We are seeing a Burlesque show at The House of Blues! Can't wait! ♪Goin down to New Orleans♪ (Kid Rock)

**As some of you may know, I lost my fabulous camera in October (Zombie Weekend Ruined) and now I can't decide if I want the same one (Fuji S2000HD) or if I'll get the Nikon L100, but I need to decide because obviously I'll want new pics of NOLA.

Theme song of the day: ♪Just open your eyes, and see that life is beautiful♪ (Sixx AM)

What do you mean, they robbed a liquor store?!

I was all ready for a girl's night out, and I was heading to Jessica's house to meet up for a fun evening out. ♪ Well, it's a girl's night out♪ (The Judds)

That's when my phone rang. I didn't recognize the number, but it was local, so I answered it. Then my heart sank!

My daughter (#1) was crying hysterically and trying to tell me what happened. She was scared and upset, and kept apologizing. I had to ask her to slow down, so I could understand what was going on, because all I could think about was all those discussions about not getting in the car with someone who had been drinking. She slowed down, and I focused on her words and thankfully, she wasn't hurt, but..

#1 is by nature, a good kid. She is meek and mild, and sweet and innocent. She focuses so hard on getting good grades, and staying out of trouble, that sometimes, I worry that she's not having any fun, at all. Well, she certainly, had her fun this weekend!

She was supposed to be at her best friends house, but her and her best friend decided to go to another friends house. When they got to his house, some friends of his, asked if the girls could give them a ride to the grocery store. Of course, being the sweet girls they are, they said "sure" and off they went.

When they got to the store, the girls stayed in the car talking while the boys went inside. Suddenly, the boys jump back in the car and yell "Go! Go!"

The best friend, is driving away, when #1 turns to see the store manager running out. She tells her best friend "Stop, he's writing down your tag."
The boys yell "Just go!"
And they drive away, only to find out, when they get to the house, that the boys had each shoplifted a bottle of alcohol, and the store manager reported the 2 girls to the police as the get away car.

My Good Girl Straight A Honor Student was now an accomplice to a crime! So much for all that effort in getting good grades and staying out of trouble! That meek and mild, good naturedness has just gotten her into major trouble. And considering the alternatives of the situation, (with older boys & alcohol, at a house off in the woods where no one knows where they are; you can paint all kinds of terrible scenarios.)

So, we spent a few hours talking to police and trying to track down the boys, because they ran off with the alcohol (which the store manager was saying he needed returned in order to drop the charges.) The girls signed their written statements, got a lecture from the officer about only being as good as the people you're with, and we were told we could go home.

We now wait to find out if the girls are going to face any charges. #1 is currently a prisoner of her own home, with no known release date. During her sentence, she has lost all phone and computer privileges, and is serving hard time on the chain gang of household chores.
♪ That's the sound...workin on the chain gang♪ (Sam Cooke)

And, oh! Is it killing me; this sentence, she's serving! I want to just wrap my arms around her and tell her it will be okay, and give her everything back. I must stay strong and dish out that tough love. But who is it toughest on?!

Workin Black Friday

This is the first time I've had to work on Black Friday, since that crazy year about 10 years ago, when I thought it would be "fun" to work a seasonal job at Toys-R-Us, because it would give me a chance to work retail again. What was I thinking?! It was awful!
We were living in Maine. It was ridiculously cold out, and I had to go in at noon. Now, you're probably thinking the same thing, I thought, "Noon? that's not bad, at least it's not buttcrack of dawn early." Well, as any of you know that venture out to go shopping on Black Friday; by noon, there is no where left to park! And, there certainly aren't reserved spots for employees! Nope! So I had to park down the street and walk in that windchill below zero weather, and still had to fight through the crowd, only to clock in 2 minutes late, and be told "we expect people to be on time." Really?! Wow! Wanna hear what I expect?!

I am happy to say, that since I don't work retail, parking, for me, was not an issue today, but my heart goes out to the retail workers that are battling for a parking spot in the rain,snow and freezing temperatures, so that we may enjoy our day of shopping madness.
♪Workin' for a livin', livin' and workin'♪ (Huey Lewis and The News)

So, yesterday, with my mother in NYC for the Macy's Parade, (which by the way, Mom says looks much different on TV. She apparently asked someone "where's Times Square?" and he said "you're standing in it!") my baby brother came with me to hubby's parents house. His other option was to go with my sister to Tennessee, but as an 18 year old gamer, he wanted nothing to do with 4 days in the mountains without technology (including TV, what are they thinking?!) accompanied by 7 screaming kids. And I can't say that I blame him.
♪Time to play the game♪ (Motorhead)

Because of our age difference, (he is only 1 1/2 years older than #1) I was out of the house long before he was out of diapers, so we are only just now getting to really know each other. And, because Mom discovered medications, when he was young, and married a more domesticated man, he had a much different childhood, than I. So, I used this as an opportunity to share some stories of Dear Mom.

See, Baby Brother can not remember a time when mom cooked, or even attempted cooking. Mom, was never Suzy Homemaker by any means, but she had her moments. She could make an edible lasagna, (well, at least one of her personalities did, though that one never was around, much) and Shepherds Pie was a standard (although I never liked it, especially after that time it was shoved down my throat, but that's another story.)

One Thanksgiving, Mom decided that she would try to make homemade gravy. She was all prepared with the drippings, and the flour. She mixed it and seasoned it, and mixed it some more, but it was still too lumpy, so she used a strainer to pour it through to get out the lumps. This worked perfectly! The lumps were in the strainer, and the gravy was in... The Sink?! Yup! It seems mom didn't think about where the liquid was going when it went through the strainer. After that, we only ate canned gravy.
♪Gravy comes in a can, it was put there by a man♪ (Really should be Peaches by TPOTUSA but I can't help the way lyrics get twisted in my head)

I hope you all had a fabulous Thanksgiving, and a safe, fun, stress-free Black Friday! ♪City Sidewalks, busy sidewalks dressed in holiday cheer♪

Learned My Lesson Well

When I was growing up, I was quite the tomboy, preferring jeans and sneakers over a dress, despite my mother's constant pleas to "just once look like a girl." Along with my boyish clothing, it was also the boys that I chose to hang with, and it was from these boys that I learned to solve my problems with fists, (and sometimes glue, but that's a story for another day.)

Fighting was a way of life. If I didn't like what someone said: I'd punch 'em, If someone took something of mine: I'd kick 'em. I would do whatever it took to show that I was just as strong as any boy, and prove that no one could hurt me.

And so it went, I fought my way right up through 6th grade when I got in a fight with Rebeccah. Rebeccah was the girl that nobody liked, she was mean to everyone, she would always get people in trouble, nobody wanted to have to sit by her, and she didn't care. She would do everything she could to annoy everyone.

One day, Rebeccah was repeatedly kicking my chair and pulling my friends hair while the teacher was out of the room. I couldn't take it any longer, and I snapped. I started yelling at her and everyone gathered around us. With all the kids screaming, "hit her!" and pushing us together, I punched her right in the face! Then, I stood back awaiting the cheers of all the people that would say I did the right thing, and be so thankful for finally being the one to shut her up. I would be a hero, the kid people would remember for years to come, like a modern dragon slayer. ♪It's the eye of the Tiger it's the thrill of the fight, rising up...♪ (Survivor)


But, that's not what happened. Not even close. In fact,everyone turned on me. They consoled her, and accused me of being so mean. They questioned why, I hurt her. They all ran to the teacher and accused me of just randomly hitting her. They never mentioned their role in it all, how they encouraged me to do it, and almost forced my hand. They never told of all the negative things she had said to me. No, it was all my fault because I had struck the most hurtful blow.


I stood all alone, wondering what had happened. What had gone wrong. How could they not see, that I was trying to help them? I looked over at Rebeccah, and felt true regret for what I had done. I didn't want to hurt her. I only meant to make everyone else happy.


Today, I once again feel like that same little sixth grader. I fought back for what I thought was right. I tried to help a friend, and when I threw a hurtful blow, I was attacked. (For the record, there was no blood shed this time, but there were still plenty of tears)



Recently, someone told me negativity breeds negativity, and I definitely think that is true. It is also true that no matter how many positive things you say or do, it is the negative ones that stand out. Because of this, I would like to point out some messages that were apparently missed in a previous post.



♪If I could turn back time, If I could find a way, I'd take back those words that have hurt you♪



♪I didn't really mean to hurt you, I didn't really mean to make you cry♪



The fact is, I can't change the past. The only thing I can do is take responsibility for the actions that were my own, and learn from them. I can hope others will do the same, but ultimately they must bear the weight of their own actions.

♪ It's alright now, I've learned my lesson well. You can't please everyone, so you've got to please yourself♪ (Johnny Lee)

After the fight with Rebeccah, I never had a physical fight again. I didn't need to. It seems that the story of what happened spread its way through the school, and even those that weren't there seemed to know exactly what happened, and they all had an opinion on it. Apparently, I had beaten her to a pulp and she was hospitalized, and... Goes to show, don't talk about what you don't know.

♪You can't judge a book by looking at the cover. Oh, can't you see, you misjudge me♪ (Bo Diddley)

Wordless Wednesday- Gimme Shelter

Not just a thing of beauty, but a shelter of defense for what's within.
♪Oh, a storm is threat'ning my very life today, If I don't get some shelter, Oh, yeah, I'm gonna fade away♪
(Rolling Stones)
♪Crawling in my skin, these wounds they will not heal...My walls are closing in♪
(Linkin Park)
♪All in all it was just a brick in the wall♪
(Pink Floyd)

White Liar

I recently got into an argument with a friend who was upset about a blog post where I stated: one of my friends started seeing one of my other good friends and lying to her husband about it (they were separated, in her defense, though why I'm defending, at this point, I'm not sure.)
Now, in any of my posts about real people, I never name names, and if I do feel a name is needed to follow the story, I always give a fake one, but in this case, no name is given. As you can see, I even use a fake name for myself, (really?! you didn't know?! I wish my mom had given me such a cool name as Amethyst Moon, but alas, no.)
My point in case you're missing it: If I don't name names, and you read something that says you're lying, and you feel it is talking about you, well, maybe you are feeling guilty about something, like Oh, I don't know?! hmmm, let me see...maybe you're LYING?! Just a thought.
♪Heyyyyyyyy, White Liar ♪ (Miranda Lambert)

When she initially told me, that saying she lied, had hurt her, I truly couldn't remember what post she was talking about, and so I told her, it wasn't about her. (Because she really is not the only thing going on in my life, and so I mentioned her briefly in a post about October, I talk about many friends, I am an equal opportunity writer and if you do something worth writing about?, well, what do you expect?) When I looked through my posts and saw, that I did say she had lied, I tried to do the right thing and delete that portion, (because I really didn't set out to hurt her.) ♪I didn't really want to hurt you, I didn't really want to make you cry♪ (Soooo not the right lyrics to: Do you Really Want to Hurt Me by Culture Club, but it's the way it played out in my head just now)

This person actually thought everything I wrote as a Facebook status was about her, and apparently sat around with another friend trying to "decode" my updates. The funny part was many things were truly just random quotes or lyrics that struck me as interesting, and none of them were about her, but again if you read something and think it applies, well, maybe it's your guilt talking, or maybe you just tend to, mistakenly, think the world revolves around you.
♪You're so vain, you probably think this song is about you ♪
(Carly Simon)

You have to love texting, especially if you're a writer! Before texting, we had to try to argue on the phone with people, and hope we could get something out quick, before we were interrupted, and hope it was loud enough for the other person to hear over their own yelling. Now with texting, we can say as many words as our fingers will stand typing (and your carrier will allow) before pressing the send button. And, unlike verbal arguments, if you don't like what you said, you can actually hit the back button like it never happened, and then write what you should really say. (Boy, has this saved me from saying some really hurtful things, that can never be taken back.)

Unfortunately, with the texting war with above (probably former) friend, yesterday, I did not make good use of the back button, and I said at least one extremely hurtful thing, that while in the moment I thought she deserved, (because of the many hurtful things she has said about me,) in hindsight, I really wish I wouldn't have said it. ♪If I could turn back time, If I could find a way, I'd take back those words that hurt you♪ (Cher)

I think she definitely needs to face some truths about herself, and her marriage. I don't appreciate her now saying I'm lying, because she doesn't like the way she looks if others know the truth. You see, I, and others she has accused of lying, have no reason to lie because we have nothing to gain by the lie or lose from the truth. Until, she can be honest with herself, and build her own self value rather than relying on the value others place on her, she will never find happiness. And, happiness is what I really want for her.

♪Learning to love yourself, it is the greatest love of all ♪ (Whitney Houston)

Shoes

A recent comment got me thinking about how we live our lives, and the many shoes we wear. So...A poem

Shoes...I Have Worn a Few
I've worn some plain and simple ones
I've worn some brown some blue
I've worn some heels in shades of red
I've worn them clear straight through
I've worn them so the heels have broke
and the toe has split in two
I've worn some shoes that didn't match
because it's what I had to do
And though you've never seen these shoes
doesn't mean it isn't true
Some days I've been without my shoes
with nothing on at all
and other days just to keep warm
I've worn shoes that are too small
The shoes I've worn, they are my own
oh, that is very true
but if you asked
I'd take them off and share them all with you

And, of course, no post would be complete without a song or two, so...

♪Whose Bed have your boots been under...and who did you run to?♪ (Shania Twain)
♪Goody two, goody two, goody goody two shoes,
Don't smoke, don't drink, what do you do?♪ (Adam Ant)
♪These boots are made for walking, and that's just what they'll do
One of these days these boots are gonna walk all over you♪ (Nancy Sinatra)

Dear Prudence-Wordful Wednesday

It's been pretty tense around here lately. We've had injuries & illnesses, breakups & makeups & breakups again, and certainly plenty of misunderstandings and drama! So much drama, you'd think we were in 90210, not 33511! My world is so twisted and turned, sometimes I don't know which end is up. And all I want is for everyone to just be happy.
♪Learn how to love and forget how to hate♪ (Crazy Train by Ozzy Osbourne)

Remember long distance dedications with Casey Kasem? I loved hearing the story and what song they would dedicate. So, today, here's my version:
I have a couple of very dear people in my life that are struggling, and feeling down. Whether you're struggling with love, struggling with finding yourself, struggling with keeping a grasp on reality, or just struggling to get out of bed; I dedicate this to you. It's time to come out of the shell you've built around yourself. Stop worrying about everything. Stop analyzing everything. Stop thinking about what you say after you say it. Stop running away and trying to hide your pain. Just live, love, and be happy and it will all fall in place. For you, I sing this song:
Dear Prudence by The Beatles
♪Dear Prudence, won't you come out to play Dear Prudence, greet the brand new day The sun is up, the sky is blue It's beautiful and so are you Dear Prudence won't you come out and play Dear Prudence open up your eyes Dear Prudence see the sunny skies The wind is low the birds will sing that you are part of everything Dear Prudence won't you open up your eyes? Look around round Look around round round Look around Dear Prudence let me see you smile Dear Prudence like a little child The clouds will be a daisy chain So let me see you smile again Dear Prudence won't you let me see you smile?♪
For more Wordful Wednesday from others:

Fighting like Cats and Dogs

Have you ever watched a dog and cat try to communicate? The cat waves its paw at the dog in an attempt to warn it to back the heck up, and the dog encouraged by the cat's wave, continues to bother the cat. In dog language, a wave of the paw means "let's play" but to a cat it is the exact opposite, so they get frustrated with each other and then...fighting like cats and dogs.


Aren't men and women just like cats and dogs? Don't we have the same communication issues? As women, we say things we don't mean, and read into what they say as how we would mean it.

Example:


"Honey, I'm going out with the guys."

"Oh, okay, when will you be back?"

"I don't know. Not too late.Why?"

"Oh, no reason, have fun."

Hours later the woman, now irritated that he's not home yet, begins thinking about: where he is, what he might be doing.
She thinks: "Where is he? Why isn't he back yet? He knows I'm waiting up for him! He said he wouldn't be late. Why did he even go out, when I wanted him to stay home?!"
♪It's all in my head, I'm thinking 'bout it over and over again♪ (Tim McGraw & Nelly)

He returns home to find her sulking,
man asks "what's wrong?"
"Nothing!" and she begins to cry
"Why are you crying?"
"I'm fine! Just go to sleep!"
"Okay, good night"
A few minutes later after staring at him in an attempt to will his eyes open, or burn a hole in his head whichever comes first, she says "I can't believe you're actually sleeping!"

Well, didn't she tell him to sleep?! Isn't he doing exactly what he was told?! I know that's not what he's supposed to do, but he doesn't know that! He doesn't know all the thoughts that have been running through her head.
♪All the words you said running through my head♪ (T.A.T.U)

And so, it begins... fighting like cats and dogs!

Women want men to just instinctively know what we want. We want them to hear the implied meaning of our words, not what we are actually saying. We want them to jump through flames to prove their love. If the love is true, they will be rewarded.

Men want us to just tell them what we need. They want the shortest simplest route to get where they're going. They don't want to have to solve a riddle to earn the right to slay the dragon to possibly earn their maiden's hand. They want the maiden to just say do this or do that (but in a nice way, of course, after all, you are the maiden, not the dragon!)

So, while my cat and dog, may never understand each other, and may be destined to fight for ever, that is not the case with men and women. All we have to do is think like a dog. Know that men want to eat, sleep, play and hump an occasional leg. Make sure that leg is yours, by communicating simply and directly. Tell him what you really mean. Don't make him roll over and do tricks to get a treat. And, stop wondering "What if he says this, does he really mean this?" No! he doesn't! He's just a dog!

♪Who let the dog's out? Who who who♪ (Baha Men)

Good Bye October!

Happy New Year! No, I'm not drunk (it's way too early in the morning) and no, I didn't already open the new calendar to January, just so I could sneak a peak at the cool pictures on my 2010 calendar (though, I'm really anxious to.) I'm referring to the Pagan new year. Before the calendar was divided into 12 months and 4 seasons, the ancient Celtics divided the year into 2 parts, the warmer brighter Summer, and the colder darker, Winter which began with the Harvest celebration that we know as Halloween. So, Happy New Year!



I am so happy to say goodbye to October and welcome in what is sure to be the great month of November. I had a lot of fun in October. I did the Race for the Cure, celebrated my oldest daughter's 17th birthday, & went to the Screamfest Horror Convention in Orlando. Unfortunately, I also threw my back out and missed 2 weeks of work and now am stuck doing therapy twice a week. I lost my awesome camera with all the even more awesome pictures on it (which my husband is sure to hold over my head for all eternity.) I had an emotional fit of jealousy which I so nicely topped off by checking my husband's phone records. Ugh! What is wrong with me?! I'm not that girl!
♪This shhh is bananas B A N A N A S♪(Gwen Stefani)



The worst thing about this October was our closest friends decided to have what was supposed to be an amicable separation. In comparison to other couples that have separated, it is pretty friendly, but boy has it had some very ugly awkward moments! And I seem to have been right in the middle of it all! ♪Stuck in the middle with you♪ (Stealers Wheel)

So, here we are in November. I'm putting October behind me and looking forward to a great month. Hubby and I are better than ever! Our friends are at least talking about their problems (and she stopped seeing my other friend.) I have a girls weekend planned in 1 week! I'm getting a new tattoo, today! I still have to do therapy, but at least it gets me out of work! I love Thanksgiving food! And I especially love Day After Thanksgiving shopping! And soon, we'll be singing holiday songs! ♪Silver Bells, Silver Bells♪ It is going to be a great month!

Playground Rules

Do's and Don'ts of the Playground for Future Mommys

♪This used to be my playground. This used to be my childhood dream♪
(Madonna)


Don't worry about swinging too high- Swing as high as you want. Don't listen to the other kids that try to keep you down by telling you you'll flip over the top. Swing as high and as fast as you want, and don't let anyone tell you can't do or be anything you want. And if you do flip over the top, maybe you'll be the first to do it.

Do pick the smallest kid last- when building a pyramid! You don't want the big kids on top, ouch! This is the first place you learn the importance of a solid foundation. A solid foundation is important for building a home, a relationship, friendships and even applying makeup.

Don't tease the nerdy boy- Be nice, not too nice, because your reputation is delicate, but just enough, so when that nerdy boy grows up to be the next software king he won't look at you and remember that you put glue in his hair, and not even give you the time of day!

Do laugh at yourself- Be silly, have fun, spin as fast as you can, and love every minute. This is the time you learn to enjoy life and share in the fun.

Don't just lay there- So, you fell down?! So what! Get up, tie your shoe, throw some dirt in your cuts, and run even faster. You will always fall down in life; sometimes physically and sometimes emotionally, but you have to get up and do something. Don't just lay there!

Do get dirty- Play in the dirt, pick up some bugs, and even chew on a piece of grass. Do it while you can get away with it. See, when you're a mommy, other mommys will look at you and judge you for being too dirty, and if they see you with bugs?! Watch out, you may never have play dates for your little ones again!


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Wordless Wednesday-Slipping through My Fingers

This week's Wordless (ful) Wednesday is all about Motherhood in honor of the upcoming Uma Thurman Movie. Check out more at Seven Clown Circus. But wait! Look at mine first!


I can't think of any song that better represents the feelings of motherhood, than Abba's Slipping Through My Fingers





♪I'm glad when I can share her laughter ♪









♪That funny little girl♪








♪Slipping through my fingers all the time, I try to capture every minute♪




♪The feeling in it♪






♪Slipping through my fingers all the time♪









♪Do I really see what's in her mind ♪









♪She keeps on growing


Slipping through my fingers all the time♪

Marriage is Not a Fairy Tale, It's Hard Work!

We grow up as little girls dreaming of fairy tales; the ♪knight in shining armor coming to your emotional rescue ♪(The Rolling Stones) the fairy tale wedding, and happily ever after...

But real life isn't like that.

In real life, your knight is sometimes dirty and sweaty, not always gentlemanly, and very rarely does he ride in to slay your dragon.

In real life, the perfect fairy tale wedding usually costs more than it's worth, and is often best done at the county clerk's office.

In real life, happily ever after is...hard work!


So, after 17 years together, we are "comfortable" (ugh, that sounds so bad.) Comfortable is not really bad at all. We rarely argue, though when we do?! Watch out! All that crazy jealousy is gone, so we can both enjoy friends of the opposite sex. Ok, not all gone, (just read Kill the Green Eyed Monster) but mostly. Now that the kids are older, we even enjoy going out with friends, and make time for date nights. So, "comfortable" is really, quite, good.

Early on, in our marriage, we were nowhere near "comfortable", and we often teetered on the edge of World War 3. In fact, at one point, we actually separated. In a terrible effort to convince myself, and somehow make it easier on him, I said the most regrettable words of my life, "I've never been in love with you." I followed this statement up with another no less painful, "I've cried enough tears for you."

If there has ever been a moment in my life that I could take back and do over, it would be this one. You see, I always loved hubby, and I always will, I just didn't know how to deal with the problems we were having, or the feelings I was feeling, and I thought the single lifestyle looked so much more exciting. So, I blamed all of our problems on us having been young, said he deserved someone better, and needed to experience all the things he didn't get to do, because he married, so young.

Lucky for me, he took me back, and we worked it out, but, I can never take back the hurt I caused because of my own selfish desires, and my unwillingness to tell him how I was really feeling. ♪I hurt myself today♪ (Johnny Cash)

Our healing process took years, and we had to work to keep our marriage together, and many times, I had to deal with the grudge he felt over things I had said, but every painful moment was worth the happiness we now share.


♪What we have will last forever, if we're strong enough to bend ♪ (Tanya Tucker)

Cleanin' Out My Closet

I threw my back out yesterday doing absolutely nothing exciting. I'd love to say it was a result of some heroic moment where I saved the world by chasing down some crazed shoe thief, or after an adventurous night with hubby, I was hurt while hanging upside down from the ceiling, but alas, it was just from getting dressed after a mild work out at the gym. Nothing exciting there, but it might make for a good anti-workout campaign.

So, a shot in the bum, some muscle relaxers, pain relievers, and I'm stuck at home. Normally, I'd be excited to not have to go to work, but since I can't really do anything; this sucks!

♪If you want to sing out, sing out♪ (Cat Stevens) I've always liked this song, so every time the My touch commercial comes on, I have to stop and watch. It's just so addictive, and as with any addiction bound things are bound to happen. I was moving my laptop from one side of the lounger to the other, when the commercial came on, and like an addictive fiend I turned my head to watch it, and next thing I know... my mouse was swimming in the container of ranch dressing! Yup every bit of my little mouse covered in white creamy dressing.

Tomorrow morning, is our yard sale. We've been piling stuff up all over the house for weeks preparing for this, and boy, is hubby excited about it! He loves getting rid of stuff, it's like a strange passion for him. With a crazed grin he moves things out to the "sell" pile like the Hannibal Lecter of Clutter, singing ♪I'm cleanin' out my closet♪ (Eminem)

It seems that anytime, we are having a yard sale there is never a shortage of people willing to give us stuff to sell. It's never some high priced item that will have people lining up around the block, either. It's always stuff that you risk hurting their feelings by telling them nobody wants it for free, let alone if they have to pay for it! It's not a consignment sale! It's a yard sale! And it's my yard sale, as in I'm trying to get rid of my own crap, not pile yours up on top of it! You really want to help me? Buy something! or send your friends to buy something!

So Saturday morning, think of me, as I drag my crippled self around and try to keep my husband from putting everything we own out in the front yard for the sake of cleaning up the clutter, while I push cheap meaningless crap on innocent passersby in hopes of getting them to pay a dime, and trying to hide my excitement that they were actually willing to give me a nickel.
♪They put in a nickel, and I sing a little song♪ (Melanie)

Writers Workshop: Mother, through it all I learned

So this week's writing prompts from Mama's Losin it are all about Mom.

Mom? Hmmm... where do I start to talk about Mom? Mom and I haven't always had the best of relationships. We don't do mother daughter things. I don't talk to her about my friends, or about my problems. She doesn't invite me out for coffee, or a movie. We don't just spend time together. It just doesn't happen. We kind of have an understanding that the less we talk, the better we are.

I'm the oldest of 4, and the only 1 from my dad. My sister is 7 years younger than me, my brother 7 years younger than her, and the youngest brother is 2 years younger than him. They are all the children of the brother of the man that my mom left my dad for. Keeping up? Yes, you read that right. My mother left my dad for one man, but she later had children with and married his brother. The marriage lasted 17 years, until my sister walked in on my mom and yet another man "Watching Jay Leno." That's what mom said they were doing, and I believe her because who doesn't watch Jay Leno naked with a strange man while her husband is out of town?!

Naturally, my sister told her dad, and again my mom was divorced, but that didn't last long, she quickly married the other guy, and after 10 years with him, is now plotting his murder.

So clearly, mom and relationships don't do so well. That doesn't mean she's a bad mom. Right?! Right! There are plenty of women who suck at relationships, but will choose their child over any man. My mom just isn't one of them. She just isn't the motherly type (although, she can put on a very good act when someone's looking.)

So, I won't be telling you about my fabulous birth, or how my name was selected with love and tenderness. I won't be doing a heartwarming interview with mom or be writing a poem in her honor.

I will, however, share with you what I have learned from my mom.

I have learned to tell your children your love them, every chance you get, even when you don't want something from them, because children need to know they are loved.

I have learned that children don't need to know all about your adult problems, or be your "little secret keeper." Let them be children and deal with your problems yourself.

I have learned not to accuse your children of being sluts, druggies, or thiefs, at any age, especially the tender age of 10 because it is human nature to become what we are accused of.

I have learned you can discipline your child without name calling, and violence. Noone should ever have to find out a knife isn't clean enough by having their mother clean it off on their arm.

Most importantly, I have learned that as a mother, you will make mistakes, and no matter how many mistakes you make your children will love you, even if they don't always like you. But as the mother, you must be responsible for your own actions, and do everything you can to protect you child, and sometimes you must sacrifice your own wants to do this.

In her own way, she taught me to be a good mom. Even if it was ass backwards and only because I've never wanted to be like her.

P.S. This is my first post without musical reference. Through music I am inspired, but when thinking of my mother, my world is silent. Over the years, I have gone through the songs of rage, I have certainly heard songs of tears for her, and though I will never hear songs of joy for mom, I do have a sense of peace and acceptance. So for her there is no music, only silence.

Tuesday Tribute- Fall Indulgence

Today, is Tribute Tuesday, so I'll pay tribute to my favorite fall indulgence: Halloween!

I love Halloween and everything that goes with it. The candy; chocolate, candy corn, bottle caps, caramels, all of it. ♪I want Candy♪ (The Strangeloves)

I still love Trick or Treating. It is so exciting to walk up to a door that you would never have a reason to knock on, on any other day. you say 3 little words and you walk away with a treat. What a great tradition! 1 year when the girls were young we went to a door with their light on, and the guy didn't know his light was on, had forgotten all about Halloween, (how do you forget about Halloween) and felt bad that he didn't have any candy. The girls looked up at them with their sweet little faces, and he asked "Do you like pudding?" "How about snack cakes?" We left with both, and the girls thought he was the "coolest!"

I love dressing up. The excitement of figuring out what you'll "be." Putting together the perfect costume, and especially doing so with minimal money spent! Of course, my kids don't appreciate the cheap costumes so much. They would much rather buy a pre-made costume then have Mom dress them in Dad's clothes, and say they're hobos or scarecrows! "but you'd look so cute" I say to a response of rolling eyes. Where's their imagination?!

Of course, I also love the Halloween sounds and music. Everything from screeching doors, to howling wolves, to The Monster Mash ♪He did the Mash, he did the Monster Mash...it was a graveyard smash♪ (Bobby "Boris" Pickett)
(can't you just hear me singing in my best Dracula voice?)

So here's to you Halloween
for all you do
to make me scream
for smiling faces
all adorned
to pumpkins full
of candy corn
I love the creepy
scary sounds
the ghouls and goblins
all around
so here's to you
Halloween
and all you do
you are a scream

Want to see more of today's Tuesday Tributes, check out Mayhem and Moxie

Zombie weekend- Ruined

For 3 or 4 years, now, Hubby has been wanting to go the Screamfest Horror convention in Orlando. Every year, we say we're gonna go, and then when the time comes, I always find something else to spend the money on, and promise Hubby we'll go next year. Well, this year, I kept my promise! and then I ruined everything!

We went over on Friday with our fabulous friends that we were sharing a room with. We checked in and prepared ourselves for the Zombie walk. That's right I walked around as a zombie! A couple hundred zombies of all types, (even zombie Shrek & Fiona joined in while chewing on pieces of donkey) walked down International Drive and to the convention center. It was incredibly hot, but a lot of fun. ♪Zombie, Zombie, Zombie♪ (The Cranberries)

Over the weekend, we did some horror memorabilia shopping, watched some movies at the Freak film Festival, took part in a makeup workshop with Bloody Mary, (my dear friend was kind enough to let me make her look like road rash, so much fun!) discovered some new music from the live bands, ♪Return of the Living Dead, Return Return retuuuuurn♪ (by Ghoultown: unique band out of Texas with a great sound, and amazing stage presence, although their CD doesn't do them justice :0( and most exciting for hubby; we met many, really cool people from various horror films.

See, hubby loves loves Scary movies, and he shares this love with #1. I'm more of a book girl, so for me the exciting part was the writing workshops with various authors including Lynne Hansen who writes young adult horror/historical fiction including a book about zombies in the Civil War. Cool, huh?! Scott Kenemore writes comical zombie books. He was on the panel for dealing with writers block, and I loved his personality. He was very honest, even speaking about his own narcissistic need to read about himself on the Internet. (Are you reading this, Scott?) He talked about how he deals with writers block, and how he saves ideas, and inspirations until he can use them. Like I said, great guy.

Hubby's big moment came when he got to meet and be choked by Kane Hodder, who played Jason the most times (and his opinion; the best portrayal) in the Friday the 13th movies. Do you hear it? ♪kikiki chchch♪ He also met, Bill Mosseley from House of 1000 Corpses, Devil's Rejects, & Repo, and George "The Animal" Steele; wrestling great and really nice guy.

For all these fun things we did, I took tons of pictures. All the special moments with celebrities, all our great costumes, all the silly times, Shannon Doherty all alone (because she thought she was worth twice as much as anybody else, really, what was she thinking?!) everything, if it happened, I took a picture!

So, where can you see these great pictures? Well, I don't know! For some reason, my brain has decided that I am no longer allowed to remember things of importance, so I set my uber super nice, nearly new, very expensive, camera on the floor, and left it there! Just walked away with out even a second thought! Didn't even think about it until I got back home hours later, and realized what I had done. Un-freaking-believable! What an idiot! ♪I'm a loser, baby, so why don't you kill me♪ (Beck)

Of course! the hotel doesn't have it! and of course! they'll call if it shows up! Of course! Someone else is enjoying a really cool camera with 2 memory cards, a case and some fabulous pictures! All, because I can't remember the simplest little things! but ask me some useless fact or, song lyric, and I'm all over it! Absolutely Ridiculous!

As you can tell, I'm pretty upset about this, so I expected a little comfort from hubby. A little: "It's ok, we'll get a new camera" "no big deal, at least we have the memories" or "Babe, I know you didn't mean to leave it. I enjoyed our time together, and I love you so much nothing is more important who needs pictures with celebrities, anyway?!" (Ok, maybe that is a stretch too far, but you get my point.)
Instead, I got "Are you freakin Kidding Me?!" "How the hell do you forget a $1000 camera?!" I know, a normal reaction, after all, I was yelling at this point too. But still.
The next part is what really bothered me, his Facebook Status: " The best weekend ever, like a kid in a candy store........Ruined"

Ruined?! Really?! I mean I'm upset about it, and downright pissed at myself, and it totally sucks that we can't replace the pictures, and really really sucks that I saved forever for that camera, and I'll have to wait months to get a new one but ,Ruined?! WTF?!

We had a dang good time, and the memories are what matters! Right?! And now we'll just have to do it all again next year. Right?! This calls for a full reenactment of our fun crazy, zombie filled weekend! Only, this time, hubby can keep track of the camera, because I'll be lucky to remember to put clothes on! and no one wants to see naked cellulite zombie! ok, maybe someone does, but let it be some other naked cellulite girl!

Writers Workshop- When I look in the Mirror

Today, I'm playing along with the Writers Workshop at Mama's Losin' it. There are 4 prompts to choose from. If you want more info, head on over there, I'll wait.


When I look in the mirror... I see ♪One Hot Mama♪ (Trace Adkins) I couldn't help it, that's what popped in my head at this prompt, and really, I do! Most days.
Most days, I love to look at myself in the mirror. I'm curvy, I have vibrant, curly, red hair, dark brown eyes, and a tan! Yes, I am the rare breed of red heads that tan! This is a result of my Native American/ French/ Irish heritage. Quite the mix! I had a breast reduction earlier this year, so I love how my "new girls" are so round and perky, unlike the old ones (G's) that hung to my knees, (okay, maybe not that bad.) I am so happy with my decision to do this surgery, that I don't even mind the nasty scars it left behind. I can now where halter tops, tanks with built in bras, and I feel great! I am sexy, fun, and alive!
Then, there are those other days. Those days, when my nice, kind, mirror seems to be replaced by an evil piece of glass, reflecting an image, that magnifies every little flaw 10 times over. My scars suddenly appear larger and darker, My curly hair won't do anything but frizz, my tired eyes seem to carry around their own set of luggage, and even my favorite outfit can't seem to hide my bulging, sagging, tummy. Over and over, I fix and refix my hair. My rage rises in me, and the brush goes flying. I scream in anger while throwing the temper tantrum of a 2 yr old. My room shows the evidence of the number of times I have changed my clothes. Nothing I do, will make me feel better on these days, when what I really want to do is crawl back into bed and pull the covers over my head. I take deep breaths to control my anxiety, as my husband kindly urges me to hurry along; we are late. So, I drag myself out the door feeling like the fat bearded lady on display at the circus. I make it through the day feigning a confidence that I don't really have, in hopes, that no one else will see, what I see in the mirror. To the voices in my head, and the evil mirror, I silently sing ♪I am beautiful, no matter what they say♪ (Christina Aguilera)

And you know, it never fails, that on one of these days, my skinny friend will complain to me about how she needs to go on a diet because she's so fat! Really, skinny friend?! You are a size 4, I'm a Four-teen! Did your mirror go evil on you too?!



Wordful Wednesday- Change

I took these pictures last year on a trip back home to New Hampshire. As I was looking through them, (and missing the changing leaves of Autumn) I was reminded of a Blind Melon song "Change." It seemed an appropriate song for these pictures. To me the song is a great reminder that when you're down, you should change the way you are looking at things, and see the beauty of even our darkest days.

♪ I don't feel the suns comin out today
It's staying in, it's gonna find another way
As I sit here in this misery, I don't
think I'll ever see the sun from here♪


♪ When you feel your life aint worth living
You've got to stand up and
take a look around you♪
Check out 7 clown Circus for more Wordful Wednesday

She's Not 16 Going on 17

My oldest can now watch rated "R" movies, by herself, without me! Yes, yesterday, she turned 17! No more can I sing ♪you are 16 going on 17♪ Well, no more to her, but I'll sing it to #2 in a couple of years. They just love it when I change lyrics to meet my own needs (not really, they probably find it annoying, but, I do it anyway, after all, they, do things that annoy me, and I have the right to my own slightly evil amusement!)

So, her birthday was yesterday, we celebrated on Sunday with silly string, whip cream fights, presents, and chicken! #1 loves chicken! Yesterday was just a quiet night at home with her favorite Hamburger Helper; beef fried rice, (she loves the stuff,) and left over cake.

#1 loves 80's music (what can I say she's got good taste) so one of her gifts was Madonna's Greatest Hits, which was already blaring when I got home from work. ♪You must be my lucky star ♪ Now when we bought this for her, hubby questioned getting it because it doesn't have her favorite Madonna song, "Playground", on it. I said it's no big deal because she already has it on her MP3. Wouldn't you know it? that was one of the first things she pointed out! And, wouldn't you know? that her Daddy immediately pointed out how he noticed it?! And, how Mommy said it was ok?! (guess who's wrapped around her little finger?)

But, today's the day she's most excited for, the day she gets the best gift of all, that much awaited for gift, that every 17 yr old wants;
A shiny new...Snow White & the Seven Dwarfs DVD! (What'd you think it was? a car?! are you crazy?! She's still not driving on the main road (see Get out tha Way for a reminder) and I haven't figured out how to get my money tree to grow!)

Trust me, she really is excited about this gift. She has been talking about it since she found out it was being released from the vault over a month ago. Soon, we will hear endless tunes of ♪someday my prince will come♪ and, of course, ♪hi, ho, hi, ho, it's off to work we go♪ I wish she was singing this as she was on her way to a job of some sorts, but for now, she's focused on her grades. But, once she gets over her little driving fear, a job will not be far off, because the insurance company will want a lot lot lot of money, and they don't seem to care that my money tree won't grow!

So until it does: (grow, that is) ♪Hi, ho, hi , ho, it's off to work I go♪

Weekends Were Made for Fun, not Thursdays

I never did the whole party college thing, in fact, I went straight from high school to marriage & babies. Instead of late night parties, we had late night try to get the babies back to sleep so we can have a little adult time and possibly get some sleep ourselves. I have vivid memories of changing wet sheets, puked on clothes, & dirty diapers all while trying to hold on to that little spark we had going in the bedroom. "Honey, hold that thought, I'll be right there!" "Just another minute, don't fall asleep yet!"

Now that our girls are older, and able to change their own clothes & sheets, (I stopped buying them diapers years ago.) now that they can fend for themselves, we figure it's our chance to do some serious partying. Well, as much partying as you can do on a limited budget and unlimited responsibilities (so mostly, it's Friday/Saturday night things followed by Sunday "rest"day. ♪Look out Weekends, cuz here I come, because weekends were made for fun♪ (Debbie Deb)

Well, last night we were somehow talked into a Thursday night out. Weeknight partying is completely unheard of from us, (the midweek dinner and drinks don't count because we're still home long before bedtime) and I don't know how it happened, one minute we're hanging out at the tattoo shop, next minute we're at a local college bar for nickel beer night, (Mom disclaimer: Do not read this if you have children in college, it will only serve to give you nightmares of what your child is ingesting, although, I'm sure your kids are perfect angels, and do not participate in such shenanigans) watching a bunch of kids play beer pong with random strangers. (A drinking game in which, under the influence of alcohol, they somehow think that cleaning the ball off in a cup of water will magically clean the ball of any germs from the floor, table, un-sanitized hands, etc. before throwing it into a beer that will soon be swallowed by the "loser" and this same cup of water is used for multiple cleanings, but it's okay because the "alcohol kills everything?" So why the water? I don't know, but apparently; they haven't read about the rise in herpes due to shared beer pong balls)

Nothing like a college bar to get you in the partying spirit. By the end of the night, hubby had umpteen nameless shots, of who knows what, and one shot known as a "Vaporizer" that involved 151, Sambuca, fire, inhaling the vapors, and drinking a dish of "? and sour," and our friends were using a beer funnel! Me? I was getting crazy with numerous double tall water on the rocks! I may have been in the partying mood, but someone had to be sober enough to drive home so we could get up for work this morning.

We got home around 2:00. Hubby showered first, and went to bed exhausted, where he got to listen to me yelling to him from the shower in an effort to hold onto that spark "Honey, hold that thought, I'll be right there!" "Just another minute, don't fall asleep yet!" It seems diapers, and wet sheets have been replaced, by sheer fatigue. (there's still the occasional pukey clothes, but now at least, we're all responsible for our own.) ♪Let's get it on, ooh let's get it *screech, record scratch*♪

This morning, after a much needed 2 hours of sleep, I awoke to an inquisition:
#1 "Where'd you guys go last night?"
me: "to a bar"
#2"what did you do?"
me"just hung out"
#1 "who'd you go with?"
me "friends"
#1"what time did you get home?"
me "around 2"
#2 "why'd you go out on a Thursday?"
me *silence*
because I'm asking myself the same thing ♪Why baby why baby why baby why♪ (George Jones)

and where did they learn to ask all these questions?!

Your Songs by Harry Connick Jr.


Autumn is upon us, and today, finally, the air has a bit of a crispness to it that leaves me wanting to curl up with a blanket, a nice, pumpkin latte, and some relaxing, comforting tunes.

Thanks to One2One Network, I have been given the perfect album for doing this. Harry Connick Jr's new album, Your Songs.

On Your Songs, Harry takes classic favorites by greats such as Sinatra, Elvis Presley, & Elton John; mixes them with big band jazz styling, and his sexy voice to create something new and fresh that still respects the original piece.

Typically, I expect to have quite a few songs on an album that I don't care for, when I first listen. Then, after awhile, I may give them a chance and they grow on me. An album, like a new pair of shoes, usually requires a break in period. This album wasn't like that. I immediately fell in love with it, and listened to it from beginning to end repeatedly. It was comfortable like my old favorite shoes, but stylish like that pair of heels you keep for special occasions.

Of course, with any great album, I have my favorites. I especially love Harry's rendition of Smile, and Some Enchanted Evening. It's hard to take a Beatles song and improve on it, but, I think he's done just that with And I Love Her.

There is one song on the album that I could have done without, and that is Close to you. This is no fault of Harry's, I just have never liked this song, originally by The Carpenters. This version has made it tolerable, and yes, even slightly pleasurable, a true feat in itself.

So, if you've never purchased a Harry Connick Jr. album before, this is a great one to start with. If you're already a HCJ fan, this album will not fail you.

Now to curl up with that latte. (If I stare at his beautiful face on the cover while I'm listening, it's like my own personal concert.) ♪The first time ever I saw your face...♪

Don't miss Harry on the Today Show on 10/1 and on Rachael Ray next week.
for more information check out:
http://www.harryconnickjr.com/


Party Like a Rock Star

What a crazy weekend! Friday was my friend/tattoo artist's birthday, so we naturally had to go out and celebrate in true Rock Star fashion. ♪Party like a rock, Party like a rock star♪ (Shop Boyz) There were shots, (many shots! including, a Sexual Alligator, Yum!) dancing, a rock band, (with a way over the top, pretty haired, thinks he's sexy, too short singer) a fight, (not me, thankfully) and to top it off: The birthday boy proceeded to get up on stage and attempt a pole dance! That's when we knew it was time to go home!

At 4:30, I crawled into bed. At 6:30, I crawled out of bed to take the dog out, and got back in bed at 6:45. At 8:30, the obnoxious alarm screamed at me that it was time to get up, so: ♪I tumbled out of bed and stumbled to the kitchen, poured myself a cup of ambition, and yawned and stretched and tried to come alive♪ (9 to 5 Dolly Parton)

See, Saturday was Homecoming and the girls had hair appointments at 9:00 AM. Why so early? Because it was also the night of the annual charity ball which I was co-chairing. While they were getting their hair in up-dos, I was shopping for an outfit for the evening, since my standby outfit failed to fit me (one of the down sides to losing weigh.) Then we had to go meet the volunteers for the event to set up auction items, goody bags, etc... before taking the girls to their friends' houses. I then showered, got ready to go, and headed back out to be at the event to finish setting up.

When I got out of the car, I looked down at my feet, and: OMG! I FORGOT MY SHOES! HOW THE HECK DID I DO THAT?!

Dear, sweet, hubby, drove all the way home to get them for me so I wouldn't look ridiculous in a pair of brown plaid flip-flops with my new black and pink outfit! My Hero!

With the proper shoes on, the event went fairly smoothly, with only a few minor bumps. There was dinner, drinks, (Mmmm Pink cocktails,) a chocolate fountain, dancing, and door prizes. While the economy took its toll on ticket sales, and auction bids, we still managed to raise about $6000 for Breast Cancer Care & Research, and have a little fun.

Now, a deep sigh of relief, that the hard part is over, and for now, I can relax. ♪At Last♪ (Etta James)

Now, to see if I can get away with working with my eyes closed. I'm tired!